Counting the Blessings

Because, you know, it seems that the-girl-in-Wanderlust-mood mode has been activated. For your anticipation, it will be last for such a long time that nobody can predict its ending. 

Well, i don’t think you know what i am talking about. Don’t try to find out it, please. It’s better that way, i tell you. 

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It was what we had, an early meltdown phase. I had been anticipated it with, the worst kind, apologies such it is in our family as my nieces were famous for their massive and prolonged tantrum. I had prepared my self. 

And so life went on. Moments came and went, ups and downs, until I realized one thing. I never found Syafiq in his meltdowns. Yes, not even once. He turned into super sweet, clever, and cooperative version of his self since we had rumahliliput for just the two of us. Alhamdulillah.

It is me, i think. I have a full (minus the smartphone time, though) attention to him. There is no distraction in form of Pak Suami. With his presence, my sayang-sayangan energy was divided into department of menyayangi and department of pengen disayang-sayang. When he’s away, practically all of it goes to Syafiq. He’s happy with it and has no time for meltdowns. That simple.

Well, it’s just my spontaneus guessing. Pak Suami has another idea. He thinks that Syafiq is such a considerate toddler. He -Syafiq- knows that it’s only him and me, and most of things will be just shared between us (that everything will come back to him eventually). This way, he choose to be a sweet and kind boy, to make things easier for his self and for me. 

Whatever it is, i am so thankful for this. That’s why i put it as #1 in my blessings. 

Btw, i hope this post won’t be a jinx (may Allah forbid). I wish Syafiq is in his zen toddler mode for the whole periode, that his wild wild meltdown phase will not be returned. 


Tentang Waktu

Posting instagram saya tempo hari membuat saya menyadari betapa sok tahunya saya. Sok tahu, padahal setelah saya pikirkan lebih jauh, ternyata saya tak tahu apa-apa. 

Bagaimana bisa saya menduga bahwa pohon yang tumbuh paling ujung itu mati sebelum waktunya, coba? Sepertinya pikiran saya terpaku pada sebagian besar populasi pohon yang masih segar menghijau saat saya mengambil gambar tsersebut. Yang lain masih sehat, kok, jadi seharusnya pohon yang mengering itu juga masih sehat. Bukankah mereka ditanam pada waktu yang sama? Oh, sedemikian tidak runtutnya logika saya. Apakah sekelompok pohon yang ditanam pada waktu yang sama harus mati pada waktu yang sama pula?

Lagi pula, bagaimana saya tahu kalau saat itu bukanlah waktu untuk pohon tersebut mengering? Apa yang saya ketahui tentang waktu bagi setiap individu? Bukankah itu rahasia bagi setiap makhluk, yang hanya dapat diketahui saat waktu itu tiba? 

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Yes, this is me overthinking things again. Thank to my sleepness nights.